1. The matching T-shirt family.
We get it, you love each other, but do you all need to be in the churro line?
2. The first-timers.
You’re about to say, “Sheesh, calm down!” But then you remember how excited you were the first time you visited the park and instantly get jealous of their excitement.
3. The fanatics.
4. The people who bring their own food to “save money.”
At $92 a ticket, who can blame them?
5. The hipsters.
Where did they buy that vintage Mickey Mouse sweater? And why are they Instagramming everything?
6. The early birds.
Getting there when the park opens sounds great. But then 3 o’ clock rolls around, and you’re all, “Coffee, anyone?”
7. The pin peeps.
They’ve been looking for that Cheshire Cat pin for years, and today might be their lucky day to find it.
8. The kids who are not having a good time.
You would cry too if you didn’t understand that all those giant characters weren’t real and seemingly trying to eat you.
9. The little princesses.
A few years ago, they didn’t seem to exist. Now, trails of glitter and the smell of Aqua Net are everywhere. EVERYWHERE!
11. The tourists.
AKA the people in line who don’t notice that they keep ramming into you with their giant backpacks.
12. The awkward daters.
Whether it be teens or recently divorced fortysomethings, there is something eternally awkward with two people making small chat over a Dole Whip.
13. The goths.
Keeping The Nightmare Before Christmas relevant since 1993.
14. The “injured.”
Is that even a real cast, or do you just want to cut to the front of the line on Indiana Jones?
15. The people who must take a funny picture on every ride that offers it.
Guilty as charged.
16. The people who snag seats for the parade really early.
You’re really going to sit down at noon for a parade that starts at 4:00 p.m.? If so, can I have your Fast Pass for Space Mountain?
17. The guy eating a giant turkey leg.
Trust me, you want to be this guy.
18. The grandparents.
“We’re just gonna sit down for a — zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.”
20. The celebrity who is being privately escorted around and gets to go to the front of the line because they are better than you.
At least, that’s how most of us feel.
21. The guy who is there alone.
You want me to take your picture? Sure. Wait, why are you looking at me like that? No, I don’t want to ride “Splash Mountain” with you.